Chemicals please!

In my home country I try to buy organic stuff. I am convinced this is healthier so I avoid chemicals as much as possible. With this spoilt attitude I arrived in Zambia and learned the hard way that, sometimes, chemicals are your best friend.

I love to watch these stunning sunsets. Unfortunately, this is exactly the right time to get eaten alive.

I was outraged by the thought of my room being sprayed with all these hardcore chemicals and told the manager to skip my room. Why would I need to inhale all these horrible toxins when being well-supplied with expensive Swiss-made Moskito Spray that is less deadly?

Two weeks later: „Bring these fucking chemicals. Bring them all and spray everywhere. Spray my mozzie net, my bed, my body. Please!!!!!

After I’ve spent some sleepless nights with scratching myself (Yez, scratching can be so satisfying), it was time for another approach. I am getting an expert in being chewed. I can distinguish mozzie bites from midgies, spiders, ants, guinea fowl ants and others. Some bites hurt, some are big and get hot but are not super itchy, and some are itchy like fuck (excuse my language).

These little monsters suck my blood everywhere. Under the shower, by the fish ponds, in the bed, everywhere!!!! I really love animals. Everybody who knows me a bit knows how much I love them. But these blood suckers…I just wanna kill them all. Tear the wings off them and torture them in many ways.

„You‘ll get used to it“ the locals tell me.“ Honestly, I doubt it. But I still love to watch the sunsets while the mozzies are licking my expensive Swiss spray off me as if it was ice cream. Apropos ice cream, I need to go now. Bought some ice cream today and it wants to be eaten. Bye bye for today:)

Published by caribiologist

Postdoc at the University of Basel, Switzerland

One thought on “Chemicals please!

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